Everywhere I look in my house, there are improvements to make, and I am not talking about the building where my family lives. By home, I mean where you spend most of your time. Our houses shelter us; our personalities and bodies are home, and sometimes home is not so sweet. Here are five recommendations that might change the appearance of where you live.
The aisles of Lowes and Home Depot fill with homeowners seeking hardware and lumber to make home repairs. Often couples debate and argue about how to manage a project. Sometimes heated arguments take place at the service desk as clerks try to smooth over a consumer’s anger. The irony is that the do-it-yourself homeowner has emotional leaking valves with a few loose planks. Their conversation recommends some repair projects on their true residence, where they really live.
We all have unfinished home improvement projects (if you think you don’t, ask your spouse). Home projects show up on a list. We check them off, and move on to the next one. We study, plan, construct, repair, and feel satisfaction with the project’s completion. We also have many unfinished personality projects; just how do we get them fixed and finished?
Home Depot and Lowes have talented folks for plumbing, carpentry, electrical, and gardening. Where do we find helpful resources to fix the circuits of our personality, or nail down a loose plank in our biography? Who helps us with personal improvement? How do we get the job done?
A colleague said to me, “Ray, we can only help those who want to help themselves.” During another conversation he told me, “Most people over age 30 have a hard time making changes in their personalities.” The die is caste; the mold is set. Often frustration shows up when we get stuck and perplexed by a personality flaw. We stride through the aisles of life angry rather than resourceful. We walk in circles rather than marching to the help desk. Sometimes, we head to the parkinglot muttering about everyone else’s incompetence. Our house remains a shambled shack with rusted events strewn on the front lawn.
Many suffer such burdens, and they are not alone. The American Psychological Association states that more than 50% of the US population has a relative stuck in the stupor of alcoholism. An alcoholic’s dis-repair or dispair shows up in anger, memory loss, and depression. Just about 14 million American adults abuse themselves and their family (National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism). “Young adults, ages 18-29, have the highest rate of alcohol problems,” according to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. This group is more likely to confront personal violence than other age groups.
We all face dangers, and we face them at an early age. Setting ourselves free, getting the home-repairs to our personality fixed is challenging and hopeful. You just have to get into the right aisle to find the person with expertise fitting your need. Before doing that, Here are a few pointers (this is just an outline, not a total solution).
* Find a qualified professional. * Research the cause of your need. * Record the progression of events bringing you to this point. * Change your thought patterns: think positively about your potential to fix the problem(s). * Work on each repair until you (or someone else) sees measureable results.
Whether young or old, personal repair projects can be fixed. Neither youth or old age imperil your potential. Your perceptions of success will determine the results achieved and the way you get the work done. If you can follow directions and act on what you learn with a life-time commitment toward self-improvement, your life experiences will improve. If you give up, or decide to live within the malaise of routine, you will forget the adventures of youth and old age. Using the right tools and following a plan with professional guidance could turn a shack into a castle, a pauper into a king.
We know it is possible because we take steps to make it happen. According to an American Psychological Association study, more than 50% of all Americans seek counseling or therapy. Not every therapeutic session works. A few factors help you achieve success. It is similar to getting a home improvement project completed.
Ever wandered up and down aisles at home improvement centers seeking the right person to answer your question. Oh, we can find plenty of answers, but many times the answer just does not make sense. We walk away thinking, “I know that will not work.”
Finding a healthcare professional or personal counselor is the same. You have to interview many to find one. The “one” hears you, replies, and you know what your hearing makes sense. You finally have someone who knows what they are talking about, speaks your language, and directs you on how to get the repairs done.
When this happens, you find yourself motivated to work. It takes work, perspiration, and moments of frustration. At times, you will bang your thumb. At the end of some projects you will realize it came out @$! backwards, and you have to do it over, but you will do it over until you get it reasonably right.
How do I know this works. I have done it. Finding the right person was serendipitous. He was recommended, but it did not go well at first. We met on Friday afternoon. At the beginning of one session he said, “Ray, you are like a little boy who had the covers over his head. You lowered them to your chin, but that is all you are doing; you are not willing to work. You are wasting your money and my time. It is better to end these sessions.” I went home dumb, baffled, and angry. After hours of thinking, I called his answering machine saying, “I am ready to work.” It took ten years, two times a week. One day he said to a group of three, “Ray is bored. Ray on Monday come in to say good bye,” and on Monday I did. That was 20 years ago.
Our homes need constant repair and so do we. It is easier to fix a leaking pipe or a creaking stair. Those projects require tools and instruction to get the job done. Our personalities work similarly. If we struggle with issues derived from youth and family, or an event we did not plan or expect, then help is what we should seek, work is what we should do, and a finished and well-done project is what we should expect.
Copyright (C) 2006, A. Raymond Randall. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
Watch the video related to personal improvement
Becoming charismatic requires genuineness and empathy. Find out how to be charismatic withtips from a professional psychologist in this free video about self-improvement tips. Expert: Dr. Paul Vehorn Contact: www.AskDoctorPaul.com Bio: Dr. Paul Vehorn has a Ph.D and did graduate work in behavior psychology. Vehorn wrote “Dynami
c Dating” and “Boomer Girls, a Woman’s Guide to Men & Dating.” Filmmaker: Christopher Rokosz
Help answer the question about personal improvement
Looking for Personal Improvement web 2.0 site?
I read some blog comment few weeks ago and somebody was recommending a website that is about Personal Improvement community related. I can not remember the site name, what exactly it does. It is not 43things.
I can not find it anywhere by spending 3 hours searching and my last hope is Answers. Can anybody help to throw some names so that can ring the bell?
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Tags: breese, christine, How To Have A Better Day, Improvement, message, messenger, Quality Improvement, self, self improvement, Self-help
true.
John Edwards! He will stand up to the Corporations, he will stand up to the lobbyists, PACs and special interest groups and he will stand up FOR the American PEOPLE!
its how he messed up the shakespeare quote…
'Trigger The True Motivation In You'
'Unlock The Magic of Exceptional Communication In You'
'The Road to Resolution IS Communication'
OR: 'The Road To Resolution – THIS WAY (followed by an arrow leading to a communication sign)
'Step off The edge and Plunge Into Success'
Regards,
Ann.
I just want to know how to look attractive…….
Hi there
I am not aware of any chat rooms that would provide you with personal development skills to be honest.
Chat rooms are just a bit of fun !
Woc
lol ppl gave u thumbs downs fir that, jealous foolz
if was talking to this guy, i would not feel comfortable; and I’m a woman..
There is nothing about his gestures that seem genuine. He seems like a pimp or somthing
I’ve been told I’m charismatic numerous times.
book collectors are usually not very charismatic.. no offense..
this guy is hilarious…
Ironically speaking, that;s being dynamic
are you feeling the boringness your lecture to me? I’m not sensing the empathy DOCTOR. haha
Thats true stuff tho real talk. ingenuity is hard to find.
Everything from this guy’s synchronized two-handed gestures to his inauthentic smile is so rehearsed that he shouldn’t be one to give advise on being genuine.
Have fun…{:-{}.
Your question is too vague.
weird old guy…
The government is NOT in the business of giving away free money for the sake of giving away money. There are no grants for paying bills, no grants for paying off credit cards, no grants for getting out of debt and no grants for simply fattening your wallet.
Grants are free, but it means OBLIGATION. You will be obligated to do as the grant sets out to do. Grants have objectives, and your purpose must fit the objective of the grant.
For one, you have to write the grant application and the grant application is not a simple document – you have to explain how your purpose for applying for the grant fits well with the objectives set out by the grant.
There is a stringent review process through a committee. You will compete with other applicants for the grant money, and this grant review committee will evaluate the merits of each proposal. Only those that they feel exemplifies the objective of the grant will be approved.
You can go to the Catalog of Federal Domestic Assistance (CFDA) http://www.cfda.gov and Grants.gov http://www.grants.gov – these are two sites created by the federal government to provide transparency and information on grants. Browse through the listings and see if you can find any grant that would support your purposes.
Even if you buy books on "how to get grants" or list that supposedly has information on grants — all of them are mere rehash of what CFDA has, albeit packaged differently.
Note though that these grants generally support non-profit organizations, intermediary lending institutions, and state and local governments. Most of the federal grants are given to specific target groups with specific requirements (e.g. minority business owners involved in transportation related contracts emanating from DOT – Grant#20.905 Disadvantaged Business Enterprises Short Term Lending Program. Individuals especially for personal purposes are not eligible for federal grants.
Grants are also often given to non profit groups or organizations involved in training or other similar activities (grant 59.043 Women's Business Ownership Assistance that are given to those who will create women's business center that will train women entrepreneurs
i agree he seems oddly shady…
Try "The Imitation of Christ" by Thomas à Kempis at: http://www.leaderu.com/cyber/books/imitation/imitation.html
With love in Christ.
A home equity loan would be 5-8% and a personal loan would be 10-20%. Of course depending on your credit rating.
On the relationship side of things, you should read "Why marriages succeed and fail" – John Gottman. You dont have to be married to get something from this book. Its about relationship dynamics and what you should and shouldnt do. Very basic and commensense like.
In terms of personal improvement i'd check out "Self matters" by Dr. phil mcgraw. I know, I know its that big bald guy from the tv. Dont let that put you off, its a quality book, which is easy to follow.
write your boss a letter, keep a copy.
Try to imporove your behavior, too. If you can change the things that your boss is asking you to do, then fix them. If not, then write in your letter why you can not.
Eventually you will get fired, and you may want to get unemployment benefits until you get a new job. Then you will show the judge (yes, you will go to court to fight for unemployment benefits) and you will show this letter saying that you are doing the best you can. Good luck!
I am when I’m trying to get a better price for a book or book set, lol.
That depends on your loan amount, equity, loan to value, credit history, credit score, current income, etc. There are quite a few factors.
2nd mortgage rates are getting lower since the Feds lowered the interest rate. I would estimate anywhere between 6-9% if you have excellent credit and own over 20% of your home.
I'm too much of a softy. I am afraid of confrontation. People pleasing is hard work and you always get mad at yourself for not standing up for what you want.
Hello Father Joseph.
>>>>>>>>" the state making us all puppets of the state "<<<<<<<<
>>>>>>>>" the dog never bites the hand that feeds him "<<<<<<<<
Regards,
Lenny.
LMAOOOOOO its true.
but he is not charasmatic